I will return
by Lady Perditus
Summary: "'I'll come back,' he muttered, looking down. 'This is just…something I have to do.'" Merlin never broke a promise and he never really left Camelot because it was his home. Guinevere witnesses the changes over the years. Oneshot.


**AN: So this was based off my personal belief that Merlin wouldn't just ditch Camelot once Arthur died. I don't really see him as the kind to mourn forever, especially with the promise of the Once and Future King returning. I hope you enjoy reading this just as I enjoyed writing it. x3 **

**Little experiment with style. I don't usually write stories with such short sections and so much time skipping, so it was fun to try something new! :D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin. **

**Summary: **"'I'll come back,' he muttered, looking down. 'This is just…something I have to do.'" Merlin never broke a promise and he never really left Camelot because it was his home. Guinevere witnesses the changes over the years.

* * *

Guinevere knew what he was going to say as he entered the quiet throne room. Even if that sad, downtrodden look wasn't on his face, the queen could feel it within her heart to be true, no matter how much she wanted to believe otherwise.

Nonetheless she felt tears rise up in her eyes as she stood up and walked towards her husband's loyal manservant.

"Oh, Merlin," she whispered, placing a hand on his shoulder. She couldn't tell if it was she that needed the contact or him. "I know."

_The King is dead._

* * *

He stayed long enough to attend Gwaine's funeral. As the pyre was engulfed by the vicious blazes, the queen of Camelot glanced over at Merlin, and from the look in his eyes she knew he wasn't going to stay for long.

The manservant had been solemn the past few days, as they had all been. But he did not weep nor lose his temper, instead keeping a careful, calm distance from the rest of the world. Gwen could not help but wonder what really happened during Arthur's last moments but she didn't even dare attempt to gather the courage to ask Merlin. It seemed wrong to try and intrude on something so private and meaningful.

Therefore, it was no surprise when only hours later he approached her chambers with his bags packed and a horse waiting outside. Gwen knew she would be unable to stop him even if she wanted to, so she did the only thing she could.

"Goodbye Merlin."

"I'll come back," he muttered, looking at his boots. "There's just…this is something I have to do."

"Of course," the queen bit her lip. She would miss her friend. "I understand."

When those piercing blue eyes met her gaze, she again saw that look in his eyes, and for the life of her she could not distinguish what it meant. It was so hauntingly familiar but it was just out of her reach, right on the tip of her tongue.

_Long live the queen._

* * *

He did not return for some time, not even for the birth of the prince of Camelot; the only heir to the throne. Quite the surprise to all the kingdom's citizens, but a pleasant one at that. There is a happiness in the air the kingdom had not felt in months.

Guinevere hopes he is okay, and she can't help but wonder if he had yet found what he was looking for.

She decides she misses him.

* * *

Four more years have passed before Merlin finally returns. Physically, he doesn't look any different, but Guinevere could tell the years have changed him: he was wiser and older now, more matured but still maintaining a boyish grin.

Maybe she had changed as well. The motherly life has done her good, her patience is almost limitless and it's so much easier to live each day despite the fact Arthur was not beside her for every second of Leander's life.

She smiled warmly. "Merlin," she greeted.

Despite the fact they'd been friends for years the man before her bowed. "M'lady."

"Walk with me," she says softly, and turns to walk down the corridor, not bothering to glance behind her. Gwen knew he would follow her. A comfortable silence rested over them and the queen did not bother to disturb it until they reached the castle gardens. She took a deep breath, staring into the former manservant's blue eyes. "I believe…it is time to repeal the laws banning sorcery."

Merlin inhaled sharply. "You do?"

She nodded.

He grinned.

Guinevere knew he would stay, if only for a little while.

* * *

She had him named the court sorcerer. If he was surprised by the fact that Gwen had known he had magic since the Battle of Camlann it never showed. He took the position with pride and a grace the queen didn't know he even possessed.

"Uncle Merlin!" The five year old prince shrieked, pumping his legs towards said family member, arms stretched out as he fiercely wrapped his arms around Merlin's legs in a distorted hug.

"Leander, your mother has been looking for you." The sorcerer smiled despite the slight reprimanding tone his voice adopted. Nonetheless he bent down to embrace his surrogate nephew.

"Actually," Gwen interrupted, elegantly wandering towards the pair, looking as regal as ever. She smiled down at her son. "I was looking for you, Merlin."

"Oh?" A dark eyebrow is arched.

"I was wondering if you would care to take a ride with me tomorrow." The air is heavier, now. Merlin's face is unreadable before he bows his head slightly.

"It would be an honor, my lady."

Gwen is glad she'll have company. Despite the years that passed, Arthur's anniversary doesn't ever get easier.

* * *

"He'll rise again." Merlin had told her, that strange, unidentifiable look she had seen at Gwaine's funeral appearing again. And just the same, she still does not understand what it means.

She hopes he is right.

* * *

The next morning he is gone, but the Queen can still hear the unspoken promise ringing in her head.

"Where's Merlin?" Leander inquired, staring at his mother with the same, dewy blue eyes her King possessed.

"He has to do something," She leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on the top of his head. "He'll return."

* * *

Gaius is dying, and everyone in the castle can see that. Gwen's heart grows heavy as she realizes she'll soon have to let go of an old friend, a loyal and noble man. The physician had been her advisor for as long as she has been crowned queen.

Merlin bursts through the door, panting. He came in a quick panic once he heard the news and prays he is not too late. "Gaius?"

"Come along." She commands, and with quick and long strides she leads the sorcerer to the room his father figure rested in. Merlin mutters a thanks before slipping inside the bedroom, quietly and fearful.

He stays in the room all night, by Gaius' bedside. The physician dies later that morning.

* * *

Merlin stayed and the years passed. Arthur has not risen and Leander grew older, wiser, with the help of his mother and the court sorcerer.

Guinevere is beaming with pride as her son is crowned Prince of Camelot, and when she glances over at her friend she sees the same looks of happiness and fondness in his deep blue eyes as those reflecting on her face.

Leander is old enough to understand his father's sacrifice and wise enough to understand why Merlin leaves the day before his death anniversary. This time he doesn't ask why.

* * *

The last time Gwen sees him is when she is old and frail. Her lively hair is now white, and wrinkles adorn her still beautiful face. She has long since passed on her title to her son and can't help but think of how proud Arthur would be.

"Merlin," she chuckles, sitting up in her bed and reaching out a hand. No longer were they queen and court sorcerer, merely two good friends saying goodbye. Equals. His hair is long and his beard is growing to be an impressive length as well.

"Gwen," he greets, taking his place by her side. "I'm sorry I wasn't here more." The old manservant nearly winced. _Too late for that._

"Nonsense," she shakes her head. "I could never keep you here if I tried, nor did I want to."

"It's just…" Merlin trails off, nearly sighing. Gwen can't help but notice how tired he sounds. Instead she smiles, because she understands perfectly. No words are needed and she grabs his hand, cupping them in hers.

"I'm glad you're here, Merlin." She softly answers as a form of acceptance. The old face before her smiles and the eyes light up.

_Hope. _The realization dawned on her. _That look, over the years. It was always hope. _She nearly cried with relief, and the warmth of peace and tranquility flowed over her.

_Goodbye Merlin_, she thought. Deep down in her heart she was so grateful to whatever gods above she was given the opportunity—gift—to have known Merlin and seen him in the light few others got to.

Above all, she was thankful to be able to call him her friend, and as she closed her eyes with a shuddering breath, Guinevere Pendragon knew he would return, just as he promised, because if nothing else, Merlin was a faithful man and _always _stayed true to his word. Just as he had for Camelot, for Gaius, for Guinevere and most importantly for Arthur on that day that had started it all with a lake, a dying king and his loyal manservant.


End file.
